Narrator: From The Memoirs Of Jud Shafter, KFDA Commando:
Jud: After sounding the alarm, I hustled over to the Commander and told him everything.
Jud: "Good intelligence is hard to come by, and I had some of the best, having just escaped form the enemy."
Jud: That's right. One boarder, unarmed. Shaped like a pile of crap.
KFDA Commander: You're sure about this?
Jud: Positive.
SFX: K'klik
Narrator: . . .And that, fair readers, is military intelligence.