Sunday July 1, 2001
Book 1: The Tub of Happiness — Interrogation Interruption

Transcript

Haban II: Doythaban, two-minded bounty hunter, is a captive of the f'sherl-ganni, and is due to be executed. Haban, the artificial intelligence (inarguably the smarter half) has been holding out on Doyt (the thick-witted organic half), and has a plan...
Young G'tang: Any last words, mister Gyo?
Haban II: (haban) Actually, yes. I've prepared a short speech.
Young G'tang: Well, would you look at the time...
Haban II: (haban) What, you're cutting me off already?
Young G'tang: Mister Gyo, in the dozens of times we've interrogated you we've seen every stalling tactic you know. Nothing you can say or do will surprise us.
SFX: PthooieSpack
Young G'tang: You've even spat in my face before.
Haban II: (haban) Has the spittle ever exploded before?
Young G'tang: No. Never.
Haban II: (haban) Surprise.
SFX: Kra-boom
Haban II: (doyt, thinking) Haban, our spit exploded! How did you do that?(haban, thinking) Shut up, Doyt. We don't have much time.
SFX: Pthooie
Haban II: (doyt) You spit the shackles off! I've got to know how to do this!! C'mon, tell me tell me tell me.(haban, thinking) Remember the cryokit, Doyt? Well, the good doctor's little automated system illegally modified us. A gift to keep us quiet, I think.
Haban II: (haban, thinking) So now we've got a few, shall we say 'secreted weapons' at our disposal. I kept them a secret from you because you're a blabbermouth, but I'll teach you how to use them if we get out of here alive.
Haban II: (haban, thinking) Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to place a shaped charge against this door.
Narrator: In lieu of the puerile imagery originally slated for this panel, please accept some teaser text: Coming up this next week, doyt and haban strive to escape from a f'sherl-ganni base of unfathomable size. It's big, I tell you. Big, Big, Big. Can't be fathomed...